
Raven contemplates the Mysteries of the Universe, Parking Lot, Wasilla, AK
Raven stories turn up all over the place. Anywhere Ravens fly in fact, and Ravens pretty much fly anywhere and everywhere they want, which most times is also wherever they's folks to be found.
"And why is that?" you ask, purely out of - simple curiosity -
Aye, there's the rub.
You do realize, I hope, that there is no such thing as simple curiosity. Curiosity always leads to the opening of doors that The Powers That Be wish remain closed. And for that reason most religions do their level best to eliminate - using physical, psychological, and emotional methods - all curiosity from children at as young an age as possible.
And why is that? What are they so afraid of?
In point of fact, they fear the simple questions because those lead to the more difficult questions (which will arise from questioning those first simple answers), which will lead to the deeper questions that revealed religion is absolutely incapable of actually answering.
Which incapability Satan, (and where, and what, are your proofs of Satans existence, perzakitly?), or one of his innumerable minions here on earth, (aka yours truly), will use to tempt the young, or even the aged but still questioning mind, into seeking answers outside of the The Holy Books. (Wherein God's revealed truth is soully contained.)
So, should you find the following sentence -
"We do not know, my son. It's... A Mystery...."
- spouted by an Authority Figure, (who often wears a silly hat), to be an acceptable answer to your questions, then, boy oh boy, do I have the perfect religion for YOU!
(And you should probably read no further.)
The unacceptable risk of curiosity has always been, and remains to this day, (as far as the Powers That Be are concerned), that seeking answers outside The Holy Books, will lead (has led) to the discovery of actual truths, real truths, hard truths, truths that are demonstrable, truths that are susceptible of proof, truths that directly, and incontrovertibly, contradict the revealed truth contained within The Holy Books.
Which will lead (horror of horrors!) to questioning the wisdom of the established, (by Big G himself!) temporal and moral authorities. Which, according to Paul, (see Romans 13: 1 - 7), good christians should never do.
Let us move to The Year - 1609.
Pauline Christianity, aka The Catholic Church, rules the known world,
and is the sole repository of Truth.
And Yes, that's Truth with a Capitol T!
Location - The backyard of the Galilei residence at UOP (University of Padua)
Situation - Post Galilei family annual faculty barbecue. (Galileo, centuries ahead of his time as per usual, had recently perfected his [sadly now lost] recipe for Tuscan Barbecue Sauce, for which he would soon be renowned throughout all Padua.)
Time - Late evening. The guests have all returned home. There are lots of rib bones and empty long necks lying around.
Back story - Galileos friend and patron, Maffeo Barberini, will be seated Pope Urban VIII, in the year 1623.
Galileo is alone in the backyard, ostensibly cleaning up the mess, but in actuality occupied with using his new telescope to scope out his latest discovery among the Heavenly Bodies, una bella donna twenty year old molto (molta?) mammosa coed with long, luxurious, flame red hair, and a penchant for wandering about topless in her dorm room next door. (Second story, third window to the left.) She is known to history as Gianna de' Rossi de' Monti Cristo a Fiorenzo Eggplant Parmigiana, (she was rumored to be the model for certain, now lost, paintings of nymphs recumbent by the painter Claude Lorrain, which were displayed on the walls of certain private Papal chambers), but when she spots him scoping her out, there in the moonlight, she promptly gives him the finger and pulls down the blinds.
Damn! No more of her perfect orbs tonight.
Galileo sighs, then decides, to keep the evening from being a total loss, to scope out the other perfect feminine orb shining so brightly in the night sky. (This one otherwise known as la luna.) Yes, even she, whose gentle light had so, infelicitously, revealed his, purely academic, attentions to Gianna.
"Next time," he thought, "I'll stand in the shadows."
He would later relate the other discoveries of that night in his masterwork, Dialogue Concerning the Two Chief World Systems. (Wherein he may have inadvertently insulted his once friend, Maffeo Barberini, now Pope Urban VIII, by putting certain of the Popes own arguments re. earth centrism in Simplicios mouth.)
An oopsie that would durn near get him burned at the stake!*
"So, there I am in the backyard, looking through my telescope at the moon, and wada ya know! it has mountains! and craters! It isn't perfect, like the church says. And another thing, the Sun, that big bright thing in the sky? it has SPOTS! Not little tiny spots either, but Big Black Spots!! How can Big Gs perfect sun have Big Black Spots? And here's another thing, the planet Jupiter? the really big one? it has satellites! It's like its own little solar system, way out there. Which means the solar system is Copernican and not Ptolemaic. Huh. Like anyone with a functioning brain didn't know that already! Hmm, let me think about this for a minute. If the church is wrong about this simple fact, (and they are absolutely wrong), then, I wonder, could they... could they be wrong about everything else?"
House arrest really wasn't that bad a deal, considering the alternative.
*A little know historical fact - Fortunately for Galileo, their earlier personal friendship, and the Popes personal fondness for, and approval of one of Galileo's earlier and lesser known works, The Study of the Systems of The UOP Heavenly Bodies: With Pictures! (Of which Galileo had earlier presented The Pope a signed copy), moderated to a certain degree the Papal anger, and so actually saved him from being quick fried to a crackly crunch.
So there you go.
Curiosity leads to questioning, leads to people finding out things!
Things they can prove!
And then?
Then they start demanding proof about other things.
Things like - "Where, exactly, and what, exactly, are your proofs that the Bible is even vaguely historically accurate about anything, let alone that it is inerrant?" and "How do you know that John was actually written by, well, by John the Apostle, instead of some other John, or even some Tom Dick or Harry?
And they start refusing to accept things on blind faith alone!
And they start questioning their betters!
And they start wanting to know, "Where does all the money go?"
So You See! Simple curiosity is the slippery slope Straight - to - Hell - !!
So it is obviously better to beat curiosity out of a child early on, and thereby avoid all the problems simple curiosity, and the search for REAL answers, can lead to, such as - The viral and bacterial theory of infection and disease, disease prevention theory, quantum mechanical theory, Newton's theory of gravitation, vaccination theory, sanitation theory, Maxwell's theory of electromagnetism, Newton's theory of motion, the theory of thermodynamics, the theory of the finite speed of light, the theory of plate tectonics, etc, etc, etc.
In fact, if you are reading this on a laptop, or other wireless device, in a wireless coffee shop anywhere on planet earth, everything you're doing is based on, and occurring because of, uncountable interactions that are all purely and absolutely theoretical. Funny how well applied theory works. (As opposed to revealed truth.)
And yet revealed religion still preaches, (today using the web and satellite television, tools made possible by that enemy of faith, curiosity), that it is infinitely preferable that the believer remain obedient, unquestioning, indoctrinated, fat, dumb, terrified of burning forever in hell, (should they make the mistake of questioning the powers that be), and ignorant, than that they be educated.
And now - Back to the original question, the simple reason is this, Ravens are smart! They're sure as hell smarter than us!
Just look around. Wherever there are cities, towns, farms, etc. Wherever there are people, there's likely Ravens.
And why is that?
Why?
I'll tell you why!
Because wherever there's humans, there's always loads of free food. There for the taking. (And in the old days, if the harvest failed, or something else caused a crisis in a human settlement and folks starved to death, or died of some plague, well, I expect we taste just as good to a hungry Raven as cold french fries.)
Ravens hang out around people because we make life easier for them. Whenever, and wherever we humans (and I use the term loosely) are found, our wasteful ways mean they never have to work very hard for their dinner.
Just look at it from Ravens point of view. In the winter a Raven can spend hours of wing time - all the while burning precious calories when it's below zero - out scouting for carrion, or trying to hunt, catch, and kill, mice, voles, squirrels, etc. or, Raven can go hang out at the dumpster behind Mickey D's, and pig out on french fries, burgers, and shakes.
It's a no brainer.
Lots and lots of food with high calorie density? Free for the taking? NO effort required? I don't have to kill it? I am sooooooo there!
In fact, when solitary Ravens find a food bonanza, they have been observed to go seek out other Ravens and lead them back to the free eats. (Admittedly the first Raven on site usually fills up first, but still.)
So how about the Raven in History?
Raven is mentioned in the Bible, several times in fact. First in Exodus in the story of Noah and the Ark, and later in Leviticus, where Raven makes the list of birds that the Israelites can't eat.
Ravens aren't Kosher? Who'd a'thunk it? And why should that be the case?
Well, I can think of two reasons right off the top of my head; first, Ravens are a carrion eater, so that might be the reason, and secondly, (and I admit this is pure speculation), I'm inclined to think that Raven has something on Big G. Incriminating photos or video I expect. Maybe recordings of those naughty phone calls to a Hot Seraphim, (a la O'Reilly), or info re his addiction to certain powerful painkillers, (a la Limbaugh).
I know if anyone could get the upper hand on the Big G, it would certainly be Raven.
So next post we's goin back in time to the land of ancient Sumer. Where all sorts of interesting things happened, and many wonderful stories were told.
And we know this how?
We know this because the Sumerians invented a form of writing, which we call cuneiform, and they wrote their stories down! So we have hard copies of them to this day.
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